After a private cremation, the ashes are returned to you typically within fourteen to twenty-one days. From that point, what happens next is entirely your choice. There is no time pressure, no deadline, and no right or wrong answer. This guide walks through the options most UK families consider — from scattering at a meaningful location to keeping the ashes at home, from memorial jewellery to scattering at sea — and the practical and legal points to be aware of.
How are the ashes returned? The ashes are placed in a simple, dignified container (we provide one as standard, included in the £1,499 price). The container is usually a plain cardboard or wooden urn, and weighs roughly two to three kilograms for an adult — the ashes themselves typically weigh between one and three kilograms, depending on body size. Your local funeral director will either deliver the ashes to your home or hold them at their premises for you to collect, whichever you prefer. There is no charge for either option.
You do not need to decide quickly. Many families keep the ashes at home for months or years before deciding what to do with them. Others scatter or inter them within a few weeks. Both are entirely normal. The ashes can be safely stored in their container indefinitely. Take whatever time feels right.
Option 1: Scattering at a meaningful location. The most common choice. Families scatter at places that mattered to the person who has died — a favourite walk, a beach, a hilltop, a garden, a riverbank. There are some practical points to be aware of:
- Private land. You need the landowner's permission. For National Trust and English Heritage sites, this is usually granted on request. For private homes and gardens, ask the current owner. - Public parks and beaches. Most public parks and beaches permit scattering without formal permission, provided it is done quietly and away from other visitors. Local councils sometimes have specific rules — a quick search of the relevant council website usually clarifies. - National Parks. All UK National Parks (Lake District, Peak District, Snowdonia, Cairngorms, etc.) permit ash scattering, with guidance to avoid scattering at popular summits to prevent build-up. The National Parks UK website has a position statement on this. - Sports grounds, racecourses and stadiums. Many clubs do permit scattering on their pitch or grounds, on request, especially for lifelong fans. Premier League and EFL clubs typically have a memorial garden or a designated area; contact the club's bereavement liaison. - Water. Scattering ashes in a river, canal, lake or the sea is permitted under UK law, but the Environment Agency requests that you scatter at least one kilometre upstream of any abstraction point and that you do not include plastic, metal or other non-biodegradable items.
Option 2: Burial in a cemetery, churchyard or natural burial ground. Many cemeteries and crematoria have a 'garden of remembrance' where ashes can be buried for a small fee, often with the option of a small plaque or memorial stone. Churchyards typically allow burial of ashes in an existing family plot, with a discretionary donation to the parish. Natural burial grounds (woodland and meadow sites) increasingly accept ashes alongside their burial offering, and provide a simple unmarked location with the option of planting a tree.
Option 3: Keeping the ashes at home. A perfectly valid choice. Many families keep the ashes in a decorative urn on a mantelpiece, bookshelf or in a dedicated memorial space at home. This is sometimes a permanent decision; sometimes it is a temporary one while the family decides what to do longer-term. Decorative urns are available in a wide range of styles and prices, from simple ceramic vessels to bespoke hand-painted designs.
Option 4: Memorial jewellery, glass, and art. A small portion of the ashes — usually just a teaspoon — can be incorporated into a piece of memorial jewellery (a pendant, ring or bracelet), blown into glass (paperweights, vases, beads), or used in commissioned artwork. Specialist UK studios offer these services. Costs range from around £80 for a simple piece of jewellery to several thousand pounds for bespoke art. Your local funeral director can recommend providers.
Option 5: Scattering at sea. Scattering ashes at sea is permitted in UK waters and is a meaningful choice for those with naval, fishing or sailing connections. Specialist services run scattering trips from most major coastal towns, typically costing £200 to £500. Some families simply hire a small boat themselves. If you wish to scatter from a beach into the surf, that is also permitted.
Option 6: Splitting the ashes. Some families divide the ashes between several locations or several people. This is entirely permitted and is more common than people sometimes assume — particularly where family members live in different parts of the country or world. We can supply additional small containers on request.
Option 7: Scattering by drone or hot air balloon. A growing option for those who want a more memorable scattering. Specialist UK providers offer drone and balloon-based scattering services. Costs vary considerably; expect £300 to £1,200 depending on location and complexity.
Are there any legal restrictions? UK law is unusually permissive on the disposal of ashes. There is no requirement to scatter in a specific place, no requirement to obtain a permit, and no requirement to register the scattering with any authority. The only legal points to be aware of are: (1) you must have the landowner's permission for private land; (2) you should follow Environment Agency guidance when scattering near water; and (3) you cannot legally scatter ashes from an aircraft below 1,000 feet over a built-up area (Air Navigation Order 2016). Everything else is at your discretion.
A small note on memory. Whatever you decide, the most important thing is that the choice reflects the person who has died and the family who loved them. There is no rush. Some families scatter on the first anniversary of the death. Some scatter on a birthday. Some never scatter at all — they keep the ashes at home and that becomes the memorial.
If you would like to talk through your options, your local funeral director is the best place to start; they know the area and they have seen what works for other families. You can also call our team at any time on 0333 242 1405.